i imagine if one was to be shot by a tranquilizer gun the same calm dull softness one would feel would equate with how it is talking to my friend. she's got a soothing side whereas mine is nonexistant. another thing to work on. check.

tracy morgan is too funny

Woodrow: "No. No, it's not. Your liver has a brain tumor. It's serious."

Kate Hudson: "How serious?"

Woodrow: "Medical. That's how."

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/00/00bwoodrow.phtml

there's going to be mad backlash for this victory http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/3219551.stm

sometimes i don't realize how funny ismael is. most of the evening was spent scolding him but what he was doing was hilarious. he was acting like a toy on low battery. priceless stuff if ever experienced but i have to keep up with the baji front.

i love the concept of kibbeh. it's meat. surrounded by meat. that's beautiful. MEAT SURROUNDED BY MEAT!!! we had this place in bloomington on 4th street. it was called the international market or some generic name but we referred to it as ali's because that was the name of the guy who owned the pad. even after ali left to open another store on 10th we called the 4th street one ali's for months to come. actually, i don't think we ever stopped. every chance we got we would try to persuade him to give us a discount. he finally gave it to us when we came back to it after graduating. come to think of it, he was one shrewd dealer. in conclusion, i would like to reiterate my point: meat surrounded by meat. just beautiful.

i've been at this joint all morning http://www.tafsir.com/ now i have a headache from reading. great. grand. wonderful.

i don't see why i'm mocked for not being computer savvy. i cherish the fact that i've managed to stay away from these things. i know enough. i know what i know if you know what i mean.

odd pics from last week at: http://www.imagestation.com/album/?id=4288733911

http://www.ocm.auburn.edu/symposium/index.html

saw my first ugly acura today. not because of it's body, but because of it's color. ew. now i have to go and make wudu again.

i have two accents. one is used when i'm speaking with my parents and immediate and extended family. this accent involves random displays of urdu, affection, and a few words canonized by my own family with long lived jokes behind it. the other accent is for my friends and the general public. i can switch without giving it a 2nd thought. in fact, without realizing it as one of my friends previously pointed out.

so yesterday morning my sister was in a major car accident. alhumdulillah, she's fine. carless, yet fine. so is the other driver. the cars are not so fine. my car's driver side and back passenger side were hit. she was trying to make a left turn and managed to total the car in the process. i talk about it casually because if i didn't it would be too depressing to see baby girl go out like a chump. that's right, that's the name of my mystic teal 1999 toyota corolla. or was.

i'm getting rid of the imood indicator. seeing that i don't know how to work it. did you know you can view my blog from your celly cell cell. neat, huh?

hey you guys know what day today is, don't you?

ramadan mubarak all y'alls!

just got in. pics are posted at: http://www.imagestation.com/album/?id=4288754527
i wasn't sure where to start today's blog only because i've been doing some self intrusive thinking so instead i installed an imood indicator. i see the comparison. i'm sure you will in time too.

alright so seeing as how our dear brother ayan got booted off this list (muAhaHa) now we can really get started in conspiring against chai and her iahcchai blogspot. A couple o' things I did learn from her blogger though are:
-we like to waste our time, and waste it we do.
-we're all a bunch o' weirdos that do drugs by day and blog by night (or for some... literati)
-chai's a colourful character (and cute too! literally) mashaALlah
-IRC and all other forms of chat produced a tight online mini-ummah! insane!

I'm clearly one that ideally skepticizes any form of 'time-wasting', yet i'm the master of it. And here's the reason for my inner struggle, as I tried telling chai earlier in an oh so illiterate way:

"Value five things before five other things: Youth before old age; health before sickness; affluence before poverty; leisure before becoming too busy; and life before death."
~Tirmidhi

and of course the other hadith:

"There are two blessings that most people are deluded by. Health and available time." ~Bukhari

so. I found myself being found out whilst finding myself smiling at the screen. Otherwise known as SAS. For those of you that are FT workers, or even PT, you may know of this pitfall of the modern workworld. Ive developed an algorithm which will allow one to escape the embarassment of being found SAS. After having smiled:
1. Form your smile into a grimace.
2. Furrow the brows.
3. Squint your eyes.
After these steps have been followed, a SAS has been succesfully maneuvered into "hey THAts a reall DOOZY of a problem!!" look. You can thank me at will.

today we leave for disney world! oh yay! it's up to all y'alls to keep this blog happenin' alright? hello? anyone? ok you guys that's not funny!

Ok so someone just 'invited' me to be among their 'circle of friends' on Naseeb.com. hahahha. so anyone of u that have always been DYING to be a part of this useful but hilarious service and want an invitation, you just let me know. khehehe this is too funny. I guess the 'When Haris met Salma' marketing scheme at ISNA really worked! yah u know those ads for a muslim matrimonial service showing a haris and a non-muhajjaba selma in a flirtatious pose? THAT ONE! arayyy yaaar

so abu ji calls about 5 minutes ago to tell ismael to turn off the stove. 3 minutes ago he calls again asking "kar diya?" too funny.

i have a crease running down the front of my jeans. great. like i need another reason to be looked at distastefully.

that's it. i'm going to grow up to be a lounge singer.

hey baby won't you take a chance? say that you'll let me have this dance. well let's dance. let's dance. hey baby yeah you thrill the soul hold me close don't you let me go. well let's dance. let's dance. hey baby if you're all alone maybe you'll let me walk you home. well let's dance. let's dance. curse thee the ramones! that's been in my head all morning and i really just really could blah.

last night i was talking to chan and she was telling me about going on a field trip with the kids she teaches to a place called henry's ark. she's telling me how you can just walk in there and feed the animals vegetables right. and then she goes on to tell me how she has never seen so many deformed animals in her life. and how it was scary but since it was free it was ok. i know this is not supposed to be funny because of the inhumane treatment of these animals but she's telling me how some of the animals had missing eyes or eyes bulging out and crooked or stubby feet and then she tells me about a camel with his lips hanging down and how he eats she doesn't know because he couldn't close his mouth. i keep thinking back to the zoo we went to in lahore. that was nightmarish. i wanted to call up the wwf right there. and by that i mean i just protested to my parents about it and felt sad.

good hair days have been few and far between. today is just not one of those days. awe yeah!

i drink way too much milk. and there are times when i think about what milk is. and then i just add chocolate and in my mind that makes it mmm mmm mmm.

last night a friend of mine told me that a common friend of ours said something out of character nice about me and all i could say was "hmmm, that's odd" what is wrong with me??? although i felt pretty good about it as in my ego inflated beyond recognition all i could respond with was that.

they are such cowboys there occupying themselves with this new occupation.

don't read. listen!

http://svt.se/hogafflahage/hogafflaHage_site/Kor/hestekor.swf

read something! http://www.bbc.co.uk/arts/bigread/top100.shtml

lodi dodi. we likes to party. we don't cause trouble. we don't bother nobody. we're just some kids who on the mic. and when we rock up on the mic. we rock the mic. right.

need tix for travel? here are some sites for all your migrating needs this thanksgiving:

cheaptickets.com
hotwire.com
orbitz.com
studentuniverse.com
travelocity.com

[note bias: i'm a firm believer in travelocity]

finally looked at some shadi pics one of my cousins sent to me. i presuppose i witnessed one of the hairiest men ever. what a sexy beast.

we're going to disney world on thursday. excitement ensues.

i need to crash. clash comes to mind. should i stay or should i go now? if i go there will be trouble. if i stay it will be double. so c'mon and let me know. indecision's bugging me. if you want me, set me free. exactly who am i supposed to be?

What's up chai fans? So it seems I suck at Literati... but for all you online playaZ ;) you can check out the scrabble on http://play.games.com
and check it out chai's given me priveledges to POST. kind of scary isn't it.

http://www.tvguide.com/listings/ why is everything on on sundays? i could virtually watch something different back to back until 10p tonight. but alas. i won't.

http://www.abunimah.org/

today's discussion included the following: scrabble is a full contact sport in my family.

i got some heartbreaking news today. the kind that'll change my life. i'm in a total state of confusion. make dua if you get the time or the inclination.

i have this sudden urge to play air guitar but i can't think of the right music so i feel limited.

walk around everywhere speaking with a voice that is unbefitting your body type. it's fun. really.

i don't hold grudges often. i don't think i've held a grudge since april of 99 which was only for a few hours but traumatizing enough. i'll be the first one to say i'm sorry and usually pretend that the person wasn't even angry with me to avoid stockpiling angst. this, however, is an imperfect way to deal but still a way.

fanniemae foundation is gravely mistaken. the american dream is no longer to buy a home. it's to lose weight while sitting at your computer. it's to look younger with topical creams. it's to have a natural phosphorescence using everything artificial.

traffic light bfs are funny. making highway bfs on a long trip is the best though. the best highway bfs in my experience have been from my drive from in to ga. the least favorable was this one kid from bloomington to chicago. in class bfs unexpectedly change the relationship by giving their name out or addressing you out of context of the class and the unpredictability keeps me away. elevator bfs are too easy to make so there's no challenge in it therefore taking from the fun. server bfs are too needy. and waiting in line bfs get on my nerves. here's a pic of the bookstore bf from earlier today. http://www.imagestation.com/album/?id=4288847459 you realize this is a made up game my sister and i have to keep us entertained. a bf is not a bf in the traditional sense in this case.

yesterday at the grocery store shopping for vine tomatoes, kix cereal, low fat choc chip chewy granola bars and 2% milk ismael and i started with a discussion of cereals lowering your cholesterol which strayed to the topic of body building. we came up with 3 different levels of musculinization. they are the following in ascending order: 1) pansy 2) buff 3) jerk. the cashier looked a little upset because we couldn't stop laughing.

must eat. quick! here's a distraction. support local junx. x-rayrogerjimmy.com. this was my fav while i was at iu. will post later.

my dad is a shower singer. he has managed to obliterate quando quando quando. that and he's getting late.

i have this friend who is a total snob. i don't think she realizes it but she attempts to make me into one too. i like her the way she is just fine. i'm easily amused by her ludicrous actions. but it's odd to me how easily people are put off by her whereas i just hang with her because i know her biting sarcasm is a front. i like that all of my friends aren't like me. makes for interesting conversations or arguments when we're not talking about superficial things.

hmmm. televisionwithoutpity.com pretty snarky says my cousin.

brown people should not be allowed to wear turtle necks. mock turtle necks are fine but turtle necks are a definitive NO. brown people as a whole should be banned from even purchasing them. there's a whole world of crew out there. why do you want to deviate from that?

i ran out of shampoo this morning. so i had to break out with the stolen hotel stuff. don't worry, it's not really stealing. they WANT you to take them. just like they WANT you to take all the napkins. make sure you realize they DON'T WANT you to take the bedsheets, curtains, robes, etc. i might hit up bn today.

i don't get my family sometimes. like right now my ami is watching people's court. what could possibly interest her in that show? what can she relate to that is going on on there concerning property disputes?

my cousin sent me this: http://www.homestarrunner.com/ bizarre really. what kind of nefarious activities is she up to anyway?

on the drive to school npr fills the silence. both of us are not morning talkers. it should be illegal to be allowed to drive so disoriented. it scares me that sometimes i reach home and don't even realize if i stopped at a traffic light or not just because it's such a routine trip. why does ismael insist on leaving so early? oh yeah. same reason i'm spineless and can be convinced easily in the mornings. but come nightfall i'm a maniac maaaniaaac outta control. i better nap before i start the day.

i have some new bed sheets which are the softest cotton on the face of this earth. i'm sure of it. great. now there's another reason for me not to get out of bed. besides the one where i'm just plain lazy.

here's a bunch of stuff i thought i could rhyme recently

if you want to make a contribution
try to stick to exchanging ideas in substitution
to putting each other down
who are you tryna clown?

you start with the name calling
honestly, i find that appalling
talking about being a sufi
without acting on it, just wearing the kufi

pshhh we all need to quit sippin that hatorade
pay attention to coming to each other's aid
you don't know me you're unsure about your inference
so don't be discouraging start being a good influence

let's show each other the respect we show our mother
instead of pretending to step up to one another
about what? you gonna make me learn son?
let's humble ourselves not act like we're better than some
-----------
you ask where are the scholars who stand up today
i say within you within me within all if only we stay
true to the path and honest to our heart
be aware of our souls and fight what keeps us apart
within us is the intensity and might to gain
the will we lost to educate after we got so proud so vain
this ummah is not without
so dear muslims do not go with doubt
we have to defend our pure faith how ever
we can with the help from our Creator
these obstacles we can weather
if only we unite in our plight together
we must put our differences aside and acquire
the knowledge we require
and not blame our circumstances
rise above elevate ourselves and change our chances
to win for we know our Creator showed us the truths
we must make ourselves examples human living proofs
so here and now i make dua
we all die saying the kalimah
without a shred of uncertainty ambiguity enigma
we scream until our very last until the end la ilaha il Allah
-----------
aaahahahahaaa nicely done
ok here's the counter to that one
ajeeb, i don't remember when was it
when we only ate
just to suffice
like you don't know this as a vice
sure it'll get your stomach to make weird noises
eyes unfilled supplies limited run or you're out of choices
yo i saw those aunties piling it until it was almost gone
uncles tripping shoving cutting lines to get their grub on
such a sad state and all over biryani
it's not like they won a trip ride or money
tobah not that they would enter anything like that yani
they too want to go to the land of milk and honey
although too much attention to biri is not enough
after this post no more poems from me about food i love
-----------
recently it dawned upon me
wanting to avenge my wronged brothers and sisters
is not the way for me to be
reward and punishment are only from Him
really who are we?
to decide what's in other's minds and hearts
self righteously we decree
both sides in conflict in the name of my Lord
not so easy to see
what's right what's wrong who's right who's wrong
wanting everyone to be like me to believe
making me a fanatic like the ones who impede
-----------
you're so money baby
you don't even know it
putting your morals aside maybe
all you gotta do is flow with it
sliding by closed eyes you sin
as they sink their teeth in
with their good looks quick charm synthesized
in a matter of minutes you're desensitized
inflating your ego
intensifying the battle between the id and the superego
simmering to a conclusion
your once escalating vision
crumbled now you have no mission
you're praying to your Lord and you're wishing
you weren't so stupid to knowingly make a bad decision
given self importance slows your show
i pray my Lord keeps me in the know
-----------
tired of all of this self hate
all of my people propagate
yes i need self criticism to render
but we also require hope to engender
basing my life not just on feelings
we have to incorporate it in every day dealings
i do away with all of this bluffing
enough we emphasize on only loving
i want to perform my rituals without distractions
so let's love enough to supply our actions
my Lord help me rise to the challenge
for faith in action together i know my people can manage

here's a bunch of stuff i thought i could rhyme

yesterday i met a deadhead with dreads
we eyed each other not admiring each others threads
then i continued talking to others instead
and she stopped me because she liked what i said
we discussed lust and luxuries that became necessities
and how vacant our excuses were for these accessories
we exchanged ideas about our beliefs and the needy
turns out she was a muslim afterall indeedy
i felt a little ashamed judging her from how she dressed
her demeanor was pleasing i walked away impressed
her constructive attitude and how she conducted herself
forcing me to reflect on my own self

encounters with inspirators

did i do my wudu correctly? is this the proper attire?
thinking of some way out of this quagmire
without blinking i volunteered for weekend islamic school
wonder if those kids are going to think i'm wicked or cool
wish those parents would drop them off soon
how long do i have to wait this afternoon

awaiting the new batch of weekend islamic school

here's my limmerick to biryani
all serious foods out of many
are sub par to this greasy meaty dish
for which countless smack their lips and wish
that they were even pakistani

my ode to one of my favorites

laying awake at night
thoughts about fighting for right
chanting slogans
devotedly without guns
all this rhetoric
why don't they just get it
the purpose of life for all humanity
is to worship my Lord and obey His Amenity

feeling a bit fidgety

anticipating my own qualms
reciting in the spread of my palms
to my Lord all of my alarms
chanting the names calms
enveloping darkness balms

mostly venting

remind me of when
i only saw through your eyes
remind me of when
way before you started upsetting me with your lies
remind me of when
you were aiding and abetting my silly wiles
wait wait wait no no no
remind me of when
you ended up stealing from me my smiles
remind me of when
you were exposed behind all of those malice filled chides
remind me of when
i gained information eating away at my mind and insides

concerning the information of misinformation

my Lord let me be selfless
hooded here i confess
consolidating my antics
chances of being a fanatic
erratic maybe even spastic
what did i commit

why am i the one changing for my society
breathe free speak free
they say as they bind me
on the streets keep away from me
i'm annihilating my jealousy
letting go of my megalomaniac tendencies
i will over come my enemy

avoiding what's inside

my Lord thank you for saving me from myself
i remember love for convenience
a fake vice
appropriately smitten
almost looking to be zealous
a silly enthusiast
never daring
always preparing
feels good to let go

remembering days gone by

relevant revelations
for practical purposes
for ambitious aspirations

while taking a while to sleep

ever feel too much like sparking a riot?
ever feel too much like a skirt?
ever feel too much like instigating a revolution?
ever feel too much like a root for passion?

while taking a study break

their words bite deep into my mind
leaving gashes with letters unkind
rehashing out of context evidence of the past
my Lord how long will all of this ignorance last
these dopes they vehemently crave a gasp
while we strive to revamp our ummah's haps

while seeking to sort out the stupidity behind it all

here's my theory
on the ottoman glory
lo how the fall came
behold what was to blame
i hypothesized it was tea or coffee
be it flat or frothy
straight or exquisite
aids only ye addict
this bitter white alkaloid
thou must avoid
so be ye wary
of this elixir so scary

while drugged up on my drug of choice [caffeine ofcourse] and faking old english

i think you're under some kind of misconception
your cruel words hurt me?
ha! harsh deception
control me?
what are you trying to do?
own me?
thinking you're so smooth
cornering me angering me
looking like a fool
not as stupid as you believe
not losing my cool
instead with dexterity
my sisters and brothers even without me
will avail your achilles heel
c'mon then dare me
fathoming taking advantage of my vulnerability
my Lord knows me

while chillin at the dawah table with some non muslim proselytizers

this apathy all around me
not a speck of sensitivity
claiming to be a connoisseur
without the sabr of a devotee
the madness merges into one
my Lord let me fade away anon

while listening in on two aunties talking

hey what made the news?
oh just human rights abuse
so which party did they accuse?
us again without any clues
any chances we'll lose?
if no countries help with floose
why won't the muslim powers fuse?
nobody's willing to pay the dues
eh what's the use?
yeah the muslim ummah mode's on snooze

while listening to npr on the muslim struggle in palestine

pain pain go away
come back never again

while watching the impoverished waiting in the heat

what makes me cry at night for His Messenger?
when do i get to meet His Messenger?
where do i place fear, hope, love, and desire?
how soon can i pray to seek you my Lord?
why must peace ignite my fire?

while seeking the what when where how and why in the turmoil

my mind so tough
my heart so flexible, soft, and supple
my body so rough
my soul so tranquil, cool, and peaceful
my Lord give me what is only enough

while drugged up and waiting for surgery

my Lord your creations i admire
my Lord being with you i desire
my Lord to you i aspire
my Lord for you i respire

while chillin at the masjid

how cold and hard my heart has become
how easy it is for me to succumb
why Lord?
why me?
won't You have them turn down the a/c?

while waiting to pray fajr in a freezing basement

walking to the masjid
i grew up as a kid
walking to the masjid
all my bad intentions hid
walking to the masjid
on my Lord's mercy i bid
walking to the masjid

walking to the masjid
walking to the masjid

while watching my younger brother walking to the masjid

let me be without a shopping spree
let me be without a benze
let me be without eyes to see
let me be with love for my Lord in my heart please

while waiting for my momz to get done with shopping

today was hang out with ismael day. we had lunch together at wendy's then went to the islamic school and then went out to watch the italian job. we had guests so we had to make out of there fast to avoid being interviewed and went out for dinner to this shoddy texmex joint. that place was filled with the type that don't think twice about staring which made me want to rush out of there which caused me to have a stomach ache. isn't this blogspot starting to look sickeningly like a dairy? ewww. i don't want to be THAT kind of person. you know, the type that pretends like nobody understands them and they have to pour out their thoughts which are ofcourse SO individualistic and hope someone finds their diary. curses! boredom causes me to behave most inexcusably.

i got slapped with the "oh my God you're still single" indictment yet again. you know, stuff like that gets old. and fast. and my patience is just not at it's high right now. so if i snap it should be expected. that's all for now. carry on.

yay for today!

whether my ami means to be or not she is fascinating. like this morning she was out with her girls talking in schools about fire safety. this evening i found a dismantled fire alarm on the kitchen counter. go figure.

we have such a loud family [mashAllah] sigh http://www.glarkware.com/securestore/c181844p16288268.2.html

HAHAHAHAHA have you guys seen this home loan ad? the one where this guy has this whole pot of hot tea spill on him and he's like "guess i'm having tea" ahhh me.

just posted a few pics from the shadi. they are reasonable. i didn't have much of a pool to pick from although usually it's the opposite. enjoy!
http://www.imagestation.com/album/?id=4288908369

[note to self: make an effort regardless of the visible apathy or seemingly indifferent attitude i.e. lack of response] how fake is it that i'm writing memos to myself? i'm talking crazy it seems. i worry about my sister at times. like this for example.
http://www.imagestation.com/album/?id=4288873699

today's been fruitless. i didn't do anything. not a thing. i watched the lord of the rings again because i thought last night i was reminded of it for some reason. that took up all morning. then i watched 2 movies simultaneously. one fine day and beautiful. i walked away feeling like i had wasted a solid chunk of my day. which i did. seeing as i slept the rest of the time. ahhh sleep. blissful sleep. speaking of. gotta get to it.

i don't fear pain. i don't fear death. i fear my mind being caged from repentence. i fear my heart being closed from praise.

just got in. the trip was exhausting. partly because i had had some coffee with my uncle prior to the trip. mostly because there was this chatty girl who was on the flight and felt like she had to talk to me after showing her surprise at the fact that i could even speak english. first i'll address the funny things i noticed then i'll just talk about how disappointed i was during my trip to the doc's office. there was this baby who kept staring at me and his mother kept making him turn his face. after a while i gave into temptation and started making funny faces at him when his mom wasn't looking and he would laugh and then get in trouble for laughing because his mother thought he shouldn't be looking at me or something. 2nd. i was looking out the window at the airport and saw these airport police men of sorts and two dogs which i tried to take a picture of from where i was standing and i got a questioning look from this fella who was probably disgusted that they let me in the airport. i tried to take a pic of him but he was a fast walker. 3rd. i was just walking around [cruising the airport, if you will] and thought about getting my shoes shined. the shoe shine fella saw that i kept passing by the place and he's like "honey, if you pass by me one more time and smile like that i will have no choice but to give you a free shoe shine" that shut me up right quick and i rushed into the closest news stand. ofcourse after telling him politely no thanks even if i did want to get my shoes shined and rethinking going by and getting that free shoe shine but fighting it off. in the news stand place i saw this heavily pierced fella with a tshirt that said "war doesn't decide who's right, it only decides who's left" for whatever reason i then splurged on getting the latest issue of the economist. i gotta marry money so i can get a yearly subscription to the economist. oh woe is me. oh, here's something odd. the chick who talked to me during the whole flight to atl started telling me about her obsession with friendster. not just that, over the weekend my cousin referenced someone else who's always talking about friendster. maybe it's just me. i find things like that odd. re the appointment. i went into the office and first had to fill out new address and insurance info which is all fine and dandy but then i had to wait for a good 45 minutes when a nurse called my name and just took my blood pressure. then i had to wait for a longer time until i was interrupted in my dwelling on how irritated i was about having to wait so long by my doctor's partner who just introduced himself and checked my breathing and asked to see my stomach and then poked it a couple of times and told me it was nice to meet you and left. finally my doctor comes in to ask me "how are you doing? how's school?" and that's it. how silly is that? i didn't even really need to be there. the only reason i was angered by all of this is that the transplant nurse had made such a big deal about me coming in to see him because i hadn't for the last 3 years and i had to change my return flight from sunday to tuesday just so he could "see" me. that's all. i could just hit somebody! instead i'll just wear some warm socks and hope i can sleep early tonight.

today's my appointment with the transplant surgeon, dr bentley. i know what he's going to say but i guess i just have to hear it from him. i should go shower and not look like i've been raised by wolves.

earlier it was not so kindly brought to my attention that my blogger isn't fun. so i added a comments section. i'll do what i can. until then, deal.

ever feel like people just listen enough so they can hear you end your sentence just so they can finish saying what they were saying? i'm starting to notice that a lot about people. to the point where i'm thinking maybe i'm doing the same. so the plan is to say the least and listen more and probably reflect the most. it's hard staying quiet when my family is so opinionated. yet another trial. must keep fighting the good fight.

i like the way my watch reflects light, even if it's from a lamp.

i could use a sedative.

i have a doctor's appointment on tuesday. i haven't seen him since 2000. that's a big deal seeing that the nurse called me up and said that they can't refill my prescription unless i see him. i'm a little tense about that. only because i know i haven't been taking care of myself like i should be. so i had to extend my stay here. that's fine by me because i can catch up with old friends. the downside of it is that i have to go through all of my old college stuff and throw some of and by some i mean most of that junx out. i hate stuff like that. it's just that i get all nostalgic and want to throw up from it than actually throw away the stuff. either way. there will be plenty of unpacking, repacking, and throwing. bout that time to hit up the salvation army. sharing is caring they say. i'm bought. cause um take a small example take a tip from me take all of your money give it all to charity. great. that's in my head now.

dag. can't sleep. now i'm craving mirc.

valima was awesome. amana was looking gorgeous. slide show was a riot. road trip was draining. food was so so. gossip was substantial. people were beautiful. laughing was stupendous. pics were minimal. sleep is vital.

just waiting for the rest of the gang to get ready. ugh. i could use like 10 extra hours of sleep. meanwhile at the ranch i don't like this obsession with timeliness. we're going to go there to celebrate and enjoy ourselves not be on a regiment where at 1100 hours we have to be sitting in the car and at 1101 have to be pulling out of the driveway. but whateverrr yo.

so i'm feeling pretty guilty about missing jummah. not because i did, but because i had the intention to go and then changed it to get my nails did. now that's not cool. the shadi was pretty cool. there were plenty of aunties who protested my lack of flashy clothing and make up but i'll live. i forgot how to fake smile because i've been out of the loop for a while and i guess i should have worked up to it by training myself because by the first 3 hours or so i was exhausted with sore cheeks. meeting up with old friends was awesome as always. another chick tried to give me friction about not keeping in touch so i blurted out that it's a two way thing and she got all upset and was going to make a big deal out of it but i just told her to chill and just enjoy the limited time we have together making her even more irritated at me and talking about me with another one of our common friends who was quick to report it to me. i'm tired of all of this. i thought i was out when i left for college but i guess some trash has a way of sticking around regardless of what you really think. i'm exhausted. all that pampering all morning and the laughing and chilling. woo hoo. really took it out of me. that and a monster taboo session with the cousins awaits.

hahhahaa 3/8 HILarious! i made it safe and sound and rested up enough for the whole weekend. let the festivities begin. i believe i can take my family on now. at the airport you find all sorts of peculiar peoples. i saw a huge man that took up two seats in the plane. thank God i wasn't stuck next to him. he was sweating and wheezing the whole way. alls i gotta say is alhumdulillah. i also saw a very stylish lady. the kind that aren't seen near columbus. i enjoy people watching. i admit. i would never be a mall rat but i amuse myself easily at the airport thinking up a story for each traveller. especially if they are with another person or family or friend. you think, what's up there? and the day dreaming begins. uh oh, i think i hear the garage door opening. bring on the madness.

yo. i'm back. so i'm starting to hate packing. i used to be so good at it. i was a masta packa. but alas. age has gotten the best of me. so i'm leaving tomorrow morning for indiana. yay. yet another friend of mine is getting married. it should be fun good times. i'll get to see my cousins which is always a riot. i'm pretty psyched for this trip because the shadi is in one town and the valima is in another. you know i'll be jumping in the car before you can say road trip! i plan to take a gazillion pics and rock this one shalwar kurta mummy got for me this last time she went to pakistan. oh Lord. my parents are watching gone with the wind in the background. they've been at it for the last 3 days. abu ji's all about movies and he gets all hyper when mummy finally agrees to it. and she agrees when she's done with everything. and by everything i mean details like cleaning out the lint dispenser in the dryer and using that stinky stuff on the fancy shmancy spoons and such. they are funny to observe. speaking of observing i was driving to get to this one aunty's place and i found a sign that actually said 11 1/2 mph. hahhahaa. wild eh? yeah. hmmm it's odd not getting a chorus of lol or haha's after i say something. mirc is a filthy habit that swallows you in because of the advantages you have with anonymity. enough trash talking mirc. stay posted for more junx on the shadi. oh yeah, and if you guys want to post something...drop me an email at youareemailingchai@yahoo.com peace out from the dirty south

asad, i've been to that website before. this time i signed the guest book and noticed that yusaf had signed there too earlier this month. wild. it's an excellent source no doubt. thanks for that quote. time for some lunch. i'll post something up later on today about my trip to indiana. woo hoo! can't wait!